The Pizza Therapy Forum and Pasta Therapy Forum

[Borderbumble]

I'm sure everyone has a "best pizza" story and the "worst pizza" story. This one borders on the edge of the absurd.

My husband and I used to have a publishing business that put us on the road at least every other weekend for conventions, conferences, etc. So we ate a lot of pizza.

While traveling in Indiana, we stopped at a pizza place (not a franchise but I still won't state the name) to order pizza. Having lived most of our lives in Southern California, it was not unusual for us to order hot peppers on our pizza.

As we gazed at the menu, we spotted an item we seldom see in a Midwestern pizza restaurant -- "Jalopenos". "Great!" we exclaimed. "Let's order it.

The young man who took our order was very confused at our request. "Halopen-yos?" he said. "We don't have Halopen-yos on the menu."

After we insisted that they did, he finally glanced up at the menu board. "Oh, you mean Jalapenos!" he exclaimed, making the word sound more like "jalopy" than anything else.

We didn't correct his mispronouciation and waited with anticipation for our pizza. But when we received our order, we suddenly realized -- with dread -- that there was something VERY WRONG about this pizza. It was as if they unloaded a year's supply of jalopenos on our pizza to make up for the fact that no one in that state must have ordered any hot peppers on their pizza. It was actually three INCHES thick, and that wasn't because of the crust.

I kid you not -- this is how it was assembled:

Crust -- LOTS of jalopenos. Sauce -- LOTS of jalopenos. Toppings -- LOTS of jalopenos. Lots of cheese (because we ordered extra).

One bite... and even the most callous tongue could not handle that amount of hot peppers!!

We must have picked off at least a quart of these peppers and finally admitted that as the pizza was now totally pickled in jalopeno juice, it was totally worthless.

A bad crust has always been a major turn-off for me regarding the quality of a pizza. This is the only time a topping made me throw out a pizza. But I suppose throwing out is still better than throwing up.

[Jimmy D]

When I was 13, my family moved to Germany.

We were staying in a hotel and went to the hotel's restaurant one night.

I've always been a fairly picky eater so when I saw "pizza" on the menu, I ordered the house special.

Oh boy.

The House Special came complete with bacon, thinly-sliced hard-boiled eggs and garden peas.

I never ordered pizza from there again.

[Borderbumble]

In Japan, they have a dish called "okonamiyaki". A Japanese citizen would describe it as "Japanese Pizza".

Far from it.

They don't use regular pizza dough. It is either an omlet made of cabbage and other vegetables or a very sticky dough make out of sweet rice flour with a texture that can rip fillings out of your teeth. On top, they spread all sorts of things like seafood, seaweed, potatoes, cabbage, carrots, peas, etc. It is either served to your table which is really a HUGE flat griddle. You are given tools that look like small spade in which you chop off parts that are done.

When my husband (he's 6-foot-7) and I were visiting a friend who is native Japanese, she took us to a restaurant specializing in ononamiyaki, and the chef gave Bill an extra large one for free! The chef mistook him as a sumo wrestling student and he wanted to make sure that my husband had enough to eat because two large ones didn't seem to be enough.

That incident occurred about 10 years ago. Since then, there has been a few pizza places opened in Osaka and Kyoto, but the toppings are still the same -- teriyaki sauce!

[Chez_Jose]

[Don]

My "worst pizza" (I hate to admit) was made by myself.

It was when I was a college student living at home and New Years Day!!! I had some of the guys over for some Football watching and snacks. I made the Pizza myself with some of the store-bough (premade) dough, sauce, cheese and pepperoni and one with ground beef and onions. Looked great and smelled great coming off the pizza racks in the oven.

Unfortunately, to everyones' surprise (especially mine) ....that "pizza sauce" was leftover shrimp cocktail sauce from Mom & Dad's New Years Eve party last night. And I must say, Dad grated and mixed his own horseradish mixture so it was super strong. UGHHHH!!!

I still hear about it even though it happened over 30 years ago.